Wave Of Tears
by LilSis0401
Summary: It was my fault. This happened because of me. What if i never saw them again? I figured everything out then and there. If They were to die, then so would I.
1. Chapter 1

"Aiden look out!" I screamed, but I was too late. I closed my eyes, waited for the inevitable sounds that would terrify me for years. First was the horn, then the screech of the tires. A loud thud. Glass shattering. And then nothing. Within a few seconds of nothing came the whispers. I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe, and I didn't dare open my eyes. I could already picture the scene in my head, the glass shards laying around all over the ground. Aiden's body mangled on the road. The people surrounding the scene.

I listened as the sirens started to get louder, closer. My eyes flickered but never opened.

'Please god if you exist please let him be ok.' I prayed. I felt a hot tear run down my cheek and got angry with myself. I shouldn't be crying. I should be helping. In some way I should have known, I should have ran after him. Stopped him some how. My legs froze up before I could even think though. I felt my heart ache, It was like someone squeezing all the air out of me. I let out a sob. Kept my eyes closed. Listened to the cops asking wat happened. Heard one of the people say

'I don't know that girl over there yelled I looked over here and then bam. The kid got hit.' But he didn't know the most important part of it. He didn't know why Aiden was walking away from me.

"Miss." I heard a gruff voice say. I didn't think it was to me until I felt his hand rest on my shoulder.

"Miss," he called again only this time it was more clouded. Almost as if my ears were closing up. Another tear fell. No. I had to stop crying. I need to stop crying. This time the man placed his other hand on my shoulder. I could barely feel it.

"Miss, open your eyes I'm standing right in front of you, you wont see the wreck I promise." The voice said. I tried to open my eyes but they were so heavy. I went to speak. My voice was too dry. I tried again only rasping out an

"I'm sorry."

"It's alright. Just if you can please tell me what happened. Are you hurt?" Funny he should ask that. I wondered if I should tell him I was dead. Not in the literal sense but I did feel it. I tried again.

"He, we were talking. I gave him bad news. He just, he walked away." I recalled the look on his face, the look of horror. The look of utter disgust, or maybe it was just horror. I only got to see his face for a few seconds. Those few seconds, I realized, just might be the last few seconds I could see his beautiful face.

"And that's when he got hit?" The voice asked. I nodded feeling yet another tear fall. The next one I could feel, but I smelt it. It hung right on the tip of my nose. I smelt the salt in it. The scene played over and over again in my head only it was different. I was in his place.

'Why? Why couldn't it have been me?' I wished it were. At least he would be able to move on. He had more than me. He had a life, he had friends, he had family. I had nothing. No one besides him would even care that I had gone. I felt the tightening in my throat get even tighter. I couldn't feel the grasp someone had on my heart anymore. It was like it wasn't even there. I tried my best to go over his best features, his beautiful green eyes. His strong structured face. His muscular build. The warmth he gave me when I was near him. It was gone. He lay in front of me, I hoped, and I didn't feel warm. I didn't feel anything. Not even cold. I finally got the courage to open my eyes. Only to take a peak. There he was, laying helplessly on the stretcher. The paramedics doing everything they could to do whatever it was that they did. My eyes wanted to shut again. There was too much blood. I had to close my eyes. Let me close my eyes please. My brain didn't listen, didn't even respond.

I didn't hear the sounds anymore. I went deaf. I had to. Nothing else explained the silence that was now so apparent. I watched them put him in the ambulance truck and that's when my body finally gave in to my needs. I ran to the truck asking one of the men where they were taking him. My brain had forgotten what the usual routine was for severely hurt people.

"To the hospital," the man said getting in the truck.

"Can I come in?"

"No I'm sorry." was all he said before closing the door in my face. It didn't hurt, maybe stung only slightly. But I couldn't feel enough for it to really hurt. My heart I couldn't tell if it was there or not. It felt like a hole in my chest, but, if I felt a hole then that meant something was there right. I looked around when I shouldn't have. I was all but too aware of the whispers. I couldn't hear them, but I saw them peoples mouths moving almost to quick to really see. I looked at all the glass spewed across the ground. I caused all this. I should have waited until we were home. Until he was safe inside his bed. Until I was curled up next to him. That would have been so much better compared to this, this horror placed before me. What if I never saw him again? What was I going to do with myself then? I figured everything out then and there. If Aiden were to die, I stopped breathing at the thought. But if he were to, so would I.


	2. Chapter 2

I walked into the hospital with Aiden's Varsity jacket on. The smell helped me a lot. It comforted me to a point where the numb feeling would stay.

"What room is Aiden Dennison in?" I asked the lady behind the counter. If I could feel, I'm sure I would feel surprised at the monotone voice I had just said all those words. She looked back up at me and I watched her mouth move but I couldn't hear the words.

"I'm sorry could you repeat that?" I asked. I didn't feel my face scrunch, I still heard the monotone voice.

"Room 208." She repeated. I nodded remembering how to move my feet it took me awhile but I made it to the elevator. It took me a good half hour to get here. I had to call a taxi. I needed to go to his place and tell his parents, but they weren't home. When I had turned to leave I saw his jacket hanging on the coat rack. I grabbed it took in the scent and walked back out to the taxi to get here. The drive felt excruciatingly slow, and maybe it was. I didn't notice that the elevator door had opened until the nurse next to me asked if this was my floor.

"What?" I looked at the number.

"Oh, thank you." I said. The monotone voice still there. It wasn't my voice. It was almost like mine had left and I had to borrow someone else's.

I stood out in front of the door to room 208. I couldn't move any further than this. I was too afraid too see if he was dead. I knew he wasn't because of the lack of doctors near his room. Would he even want to see me? Would he really want to see the person that caused his fatal accident?

"He ok?" I heard a guy ask behind me. When I went to look at him I noticed that I didn't recognize him. He was black, brown eyes. No hair. He was wearing a polo shirt, and regular blue jeans.

"I don't know."

"Why don't you go and check on him?" he asked me. I thought I was giving him a look that at least resembled a glare, but I guess not because he seemed unaffected.

"He wouldn't want to see me."

"Why not?" I thought I would be getting angry but I wasn't I was only staying at the same numb emotion. I have to say, it wasn't that bad.

"Wouldn't it be weird? To wake up to see the girl that caused you to walk away into the street? To see the girl that caused all of this?" I asked him. There was no rise in my voice. No cracks as if I were about to cry.

"No one caused this," He told me in his calm voice.

"Things just happen. It wasn't like you pushed him in front of the car." I would have scoffed at him but I didn't. I even tried to but nothing came.

"I might have well as." He sighed and I turned back to the door.

"Look," He said pulling on my arm to sit.

"Things happen, we may not like how they happen, we may not even like the reasons why they do." His eyes began to grow intense.

"But what we all need to realize is that they do happen for a reason. Not just the bad things but the good things too. Life is far too precious to waste away wondering what you could have done to stop or prevent or maybe even change the bad things. What everyone should concentrate on is the outcome of what happened. Now what if you o in there. If he gets angry he gets angry, but he'll get over it. The other out come is that he might feel happy. He'll most likely see that you do love him." I took a moment to take what he had said in. It made enough sense. But fear still held me back. I looked back up at him and he was smiling.

"Thank you." I whispered. I still didn't know if I was going to go in or not.

"You think about that. I have to go check on my brother." He said walking away.

"Wait, what's your name?" I thought I had yelled but I still couldn't tell.

"Clay." he answered before walking away. I only nodded and looked back at the door asking myself the same question, did he really want to see me?

My body was still refusing to cooperate with me. I didn't want to go in but my arms reached out, hands grabbed the door knob. I was so numb I couldn't even tell if the metal know was cold or not. I took in a sharp breath. He still looked so handsome. Although I couldn't see his eyes I knew that they were glowing green. His face just as hard as ever. I bent over to kiss his forehead, then gently took his hand and kissed the back of it. I watched the monitor that displayed his heart beat. Watched the rhythmic green lines, beating like they should. Maybe this would turn out the way I needed it to. I looked behind me and pulled a hair closer to his bed, rested my chin on the comforter, and continued to hold his hand, kissing it every now and then.

I felt my eyes drooping, I didn't want to sleep but like before my body was against me, so within a few minutes I fell into a dreamless sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**hey i just wanted you guys to know im gonna put this on youtube like i did with Captured Flames ok!**

I woke up to the door closing. There was someone here, he was blond. Curly hair. I didn't know him, Aiden might have. His face held guilt and sorrow.

"Do I know you?" I asked, my voice was raspier, still dry and still monotone. His eyes raced to me, I guess he didn't know that I was here.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm Glen. I uh…I was driving the car that hit him. I'm so sorry." He said. I didn't feel any hate towards him mostly because I should be the one with the guilt.

"It wasn't your fault." I told him trying my best to fake a smile. I didn't know if it was appropriate but I felt like he needed it.

"It's mine, he was walking away from me." Glen shook his head but didn't speak until a few moments later.

"God if I could go back and stop the fight between me and my sister, none of this would have happened." I just listened to him, looking him over. If Aiden was such a mess why did he only have an arm brace on?

"You're not hurt?" I questioned. If the scene looked like that would he have a lot of cuts instead of the one on his forehead. Aiden looked like he had been through a blender.

"Actually my knee is messed up pretty bad, I'm not supposed to be walking but I had to see if he was ok." I nodded understanding.

"Thank you." I said. Was I supposed to be thanking him? He was the one that hit Aiden, but I was the one that made him walk. Things were so confusing to me right now. I didn't know how to act, what to say, how to behave.

"Well I hope he gets better." The blond said turning to leave. I let him. I didn't respond. Laying my head back down I began to speak to Aiden's lifeless body.

"I'm sorry Aiden, I wish you could hear me. I didn't mean for all of this, please forgive me." I whispered playing with his wrist tag. I read it over, ran my fingers over his name.

"Just do me a favor and please don't die. I can't lose you too, I've lost everyone, please not you too." I continued still in my whispered monotone voice. I wished it would change, wished it would be mine again.

"Aiden, I love you. Please don't leave me. You know that right?" I lifted my head to face him like I would actually get a reaction.

"You know I love you right?" My head went back to a happier time. A better memory of us.

_"Say it again." I said after waking Aiden up from his sleep. _

_"No not on camera." he groaned._I laughed coming out of the memory remembering how he nearly attacked me after. That was probably the best day of my life.

"Please," I whined.

"you're the first guy that's ever said it to me." I watched his eyebrows scrunch.

"The first guy?"

"Person."

He rolled over saying,

"I don't believe that." I set the camera down and hit pause while I convinced him that he truly was the first person to have ever said those three words. When he turned it back on he placed it facing him smiling.

"I…am so, so in love with you. You looked really cute tonight, cheering with that fans at the game." I had the covers covering my face up to my nose and quickly pulled them down.

"Liar." and they covered my nose again. I listened to his deep laugh.

"Thanks for coming. I know you don't really like basketball."

"I do when my boyfriend kicks total ass. Plus, you came with me to the mall last Saturday."

"I didn't come with you to the mall." he said confused.

"Right, I meant this Saturday."

"Oh is that what you meant?"

"Yes that's what I meant." he laughed.

"Only if you kiss me here." He told me pointing to his forehead. I did then pointed to my nose. Then he pointed to his lips, which I gladly kissed.

"Aiden, I love you so much. I'd give anything to switch places with you. I know you would be able to get over me quicker than I could ever get over you. You have so much to lose, I have nothing. Why, why couldn't you have stayed put?" My tears ran freely now, sobs becoming more clear.

"Aiden I'm so sorry. I should have waited until we were home. I shouldn't have said anything. I should have kept my mouth shut. Please Aiden I'm so sorry." I rested my head down on the bed again crying like an idiot. I could only cry in front of him though. He was like my tower. What would I do without him?


End file.
